Last summer a friend gave me a book on Buddhism which is not a religion but rather a way of looking at yourself and the world. It's about energy and the universe which surrounds us. Last month I listened to a recording from the late Dr. Wayne Dyer explaining the 81 verses of the Tao Te Ching.
All religion is theory; that's why it's called faith. We don't actually know for certain what will happen when we die but we do know how we would like to live. The question is, are we willing to do what it takes to have the life we want? The brilliant writer Mark Manson examines this closely in a recent piece entitled Shut Up and Be Patient.
I spent the better part of the last six months examining every aspect of my life, and if you've ever done this, you know it'll be an ongoing process for the rest of your life. I looked at work, friends, loved ones, colleagues, all relationships in my life; most importantly the one I have with myself.
Then a woman named Lindsay Knight, I mentioned in an earlier post, did my life path. It was scary and fascinating, eye opening and unnerving. It made me look at me; the unvarnished core of who I am and what I want and where. This stuff is captivating.
Honor and Release
Lindsay made me take out my journal and a pen and write down every person who has left my life. Try and do that! The list will get quite long – past employers, teammates, clients, lovers, friends, school chums, neighbors, co-workers, everyone.
My list was approaching 400 names and she instructed me to read them each aloud to myself, pause at each name and honor the relationship. Then let it go. You may think that Bob in sales back in '97 or your college girlfriend isn't affecting your life now but try the exercise, it’ll blow your mind.
It's All About the Ask
As we begin the new year, I am transforming every aspect of my life from who I spend time with, strengthening my close relationships, creating healthy boundaries, and looking closely at my career.
We rarely take a breath to say – what do I want to do with the rest of my life?
It's a scary notion because our only reference points are our past and right now. Can I ask her for a commitment? Yes. Will I repeat my mistakes? No. Can I take that chance? Yes. Am I crazy for asking? No. Am I qualified to go for that? Yes! Could I possibly reach out and ask for help? Yes!!
Can You Help?
In nine years, I've had hundreds of prospects, over forty clients, and I've asked for work almost every day for close to a decade. There have been rough times and great experiences; self-doubt moments and sweet victories.
But this time is different. I'm looking for contracts, full-time positions, team leadership, in an organization where I can make a difference. I miss being on a team.
How Can I Help?
I am asking for introductions and references. It's easier than you think. People want to help. You and I want to help others. We just have to get over ourselves and ask. Park the fear and ask. The fear will only intensify if we do nothing.
If you enjoy what I write here, tell someone. If you know of a company that could use my help, let me know. Feel free to check out my LinkedIn profile and About page on this site, and most of all, if I can help you, shoot me an email and we can compare notes.