The Only Constant

Change is a concept that seems to drive us, win elections, looks great on a t-shirt, and creates stress. We hear the word and feel two immediate and visceral responses: things will improve for us and everyone will need to change but us. Things need to change around here, but I'm fine!

We love the idea of it; the cozy non-committal nature of talking about it. It's as if the world was covered in magic dust and all is well. "They need to change." "We need to bring about change." "Change is gonna come." It all sounds so good, doesn't it?

Someday does not appear on the calendar

To most, change is about control and standing still while others make the shift. You may be one who thrives on change but be careful when you want to instill it on others. They too may like the theory but will define it to fit their own convenience. Who among us admits to be part of the problem?

We want things to change but often under our rules and our guidelines. And whenever you include anything or anyone outside of your own mind, the grip must be loosened or collaboration becomes a challenge. 

Actual change verses talking about change is the key. __________________________________________________________________

How Are You?

Three words we say countless times every day. But how often do we wait for the answer, and more importantly, how often do we give the real answer? 

Everyone we know is going through something and it takes humility to understand someone's behavior could be affected by something going on in their life. It's been attributed to a few people but still true that far too often we judge others by their actions and ourselves by our intentions. 

Pass the salt

I was in a situation last week where three of us were out for lunch. One buddy is going through a horrific divorce and the other friend doesn't know him all that well. Cue the awkward when friend number two decides to drop into friend number one's situation (which has been going on for two years) and lob a bunch of advice. Suffice it to say, the lunch ended abruptly. 

Hey, intentionally or unintentionally, we all do it and often we don't mean it. We want to help, offer some advice, and without proper context, purpose solutions. The most difficult challenge in the human condition is our emotional health. 

One in One

If you say you've never had an incident in your life, you're fooling yourself. We have all had at least one and most of us a lot more than one. It's not a splint for a dislocated shoulder or a cast for a fractured ankle; it's a confusing stream of physically undetectable symptoms we can't often describe. 

What bothers me may not even occur to you. What makes you doubtful might not register on my radar. Which gets us back to the compassion of others. So, let's try it this week. Ask someone how they are doing and wait for the answer. 

 You might help someone more than you know. __________________________________________________________________