Return Policy

It's been widely reported that the difference between us and the rest of the animal kingdom is apposable thumbs and the ability to reason. And wouldn't it be so much easier if that was the only difference?

We human types are complicated creatures and I suspect our reasoning minds add way more complication than is required to live a successful and contented life. We want more money to buy more things; we want to climb company ladders to achieve bigger titles; we want a nicer house than Bob across the street; the list is endless and most of it is useless to finding happiness or contentment. 

More More More

When we get our first apartment, it's usually filled with hand-me-downs from our parents or family. I think I was well into my 20's before I purchased my very own set of new cutlery (silverware) which went nicely with my very own set of new dishes and cups. 

Fast forward many years and many moves and many sets of dinnerware, and now I have stuff I actually don't even remember buying and why is that? Are we seeking something we can never catch? Is last year's car not good enough for us? Do we really need that food processor that will grate cheese in seconds?

Less is More

I think one of the sources of our unhappiness is that we have no clue what we want or what we'll do when we find it. I recently had to return some items I bought online because they were the wrong size. As I was dropping them off at the courier place, I realized two things – I didn't need the items and have no intention of re-ordering different sizes. What is that? Boredom? I'm not sure.

I guess we can make the case for just about any decision. That's why you can buy a McLaren supercar in hot pink. Our reasoning minds aren't always sound in their decisions. So while we search for something we'll never find, perhaps figuring out what we need and dumping the rest is a good first start?

 Perhaps my parents' old couch was all I needed?

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The Stories We Tell Ourselves

That won't work. It's a dumb idea. You're too sensitive. You can't do that. Don't dream so big. You aren't mean for great things. Don't be ridiculous. Lower your expectations. 

The stories we tell ourselves are often influenced by the stories others tell us about us. Bill isn't good with math; Sally tends to talk too much; Byron has issues with authority; Janet has no success with relationships; Kyle doesn't socialize well.

Mean What You Mean

Our friends, family, parents, and even our colleagues may mean well but they shape how we feel about ourselves whether their assessments are accurate or not. It's easy to say "don't listen to them" but it takes a lot of energy and fortitude to do that, especially if some of this imprinting has been going on for years.

Far too often, we put others and ourselves in a box. I'm too old, I don't have the money, I couldn't do that, it won't work, it's too late. Easier said than done, but let's accept the past has passed, and take the shot. We could just resign ourselves to letting others build our narrative. After all, they know best, right?

Or perhaps we may enjoy making some new stories.

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Making Other Plans

One of my all-time favorite artists is John Lennon. His musical legacy is legendary; his views on politics and peace are well-documented. And he was aptly quoted once saying; "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." And it's so true. 

We are on the second lap of the calendar on this global pandemic. The end might be in sight but we actually have absolutely no idea when that will arrive. I have had my first of two vaccine shots and my second isn't until August. You may still be waiting for your first. Multiply that by seven billion humans and this thing is going to take a while. Please keep wearing your mask!

What is normal?

During the last year or so, I've noticed several trends. There are friends and colleagues who are out of work waiting for the company to call them back. Others are getting adjusted to a life of working from home and having to stay home around the clock. And others are making plans for what happens in their lives. I walked away from a situation that wasn't serving me, and near the end, some may have thought I wasn't serving it. And that is life. 

But the point for me was that I had to make other plans for my life. Whatever bucket you find yourself in right this minute, it isn't easy. My folks always encouraged me to try things as I grew up. If I had told them I wanted to be a clown in the circus, they would have told me to be the best clown that ever existed. But it's not up to others to break down those barriers to our plans. It's up to us. Others can help, but we have to write the book or build the wall or paint the canvas ourselves. 

We are not born with fear

Fear is something we learn over a lifetime of shortfalls and mistakes. We think it protects and guides us but all it does is stop us. I have an Olympic gold medal in fear. It's easier to blame circumstances or age or finances or a myriad other reasons as to why we don't follow our gut to reach our dream. 

If you have a seed of an idea, share it with someone you trust and ask for feedback. If the idea is taking shape, reach out and ask for help. If you have never truly asked for help - I can promise you two things. It will be scary at first and you will get better at it. 

 Life happens whether we make plans or not. 

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Speaking Our Truth

If you’ve done any reading on topics of self-improvement, Tarot, or the Buddha, you know about the importance of speaking your truth. Sure, sounds good, I’ll get right on that. But what does it mean?

I’m going through a program right now that has enlightened and shocked me on this whole topic. It’s exciting and scary, remarkable and uncomfortable. What the hell does it mean to speak your truth?

Eureka!

This is at our core, deep down past the conscious mind where that unseen bullseye resides. One of my colleagues said that healing is not unpainful and she was absolutely right. It’s tough to reprogram our behavior to align with what we feel is right and what we deeply want in our lives.

Speaking our truth can be messy. There will be causalities; most of which are truths you’ve told about yourself your entire life. I’m a helpful person, I love others unconditionally, I enjoy being creative. Speaking your truth is deeper than that. It began before we were born. We have spent our life defining our truths aligned with what our parent taught us, what our teachers told us, and what our family showed us.

That’s it!

It hit me on a phone call over the weekend, mid-sentence, I found myself falling into my self-imposed traps of guilt and excuses. I had plans, I couldn’t change them for the request that was asked of me on the call and I said no. It was like a knife in my throat. How could I say no?! Well, I found the strength to do so.

But I let that guilt ride with me for a few more miles. I felt bad I didn’t drop my plans to help them. No! This isn’t about dishonouring others for your benefit; it’s about understanding who you are and being okay with healthy boundaries and a healthy relationship with yourself.

The toughest part about speaking our truth is letting go of the truths that we feel have defined us. When we do that, something profound happens.

Our truth speaks to us.
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As a passionate leader, Kneale Mann has extensive experience in project management, leadership development, business, marketing, media, and talent coaching in numerous industries and organizations including; radio, digital marketing, corporate training, real estate, financial services, healthcare and more. He is always open to meeting companies and organizations who want to become even greater.

My Life Path

I don’t share much about me and my life here. Sure, there are stories of clients and work and situations I try and relate but still not a lot of me here.

This website was born in April 2008 and it’s one of the only things in my life I have committed to consistently since then. I have done good work, I have felt lost, I have moved twice, I got closer to my friends, I walked away from a long shitty relationship, and I have had a lot of time to think about my life.

Good for you, son!

My parents were always supportive of my creative pursuits. They didn’t always understand how their son would make a living being on the radio or creating social media workshops or speaking in front of strangers or writing a blog or coaching executives. And they certainly wouldn’t enjoy finding out that their son has been a stuck in a lot of ways for a lot of years. Keep up a good front, don’t let them see you sweat, smile and wave.

I had told myself for years I was following my passion. Then an emotional truck broadsided me and put my on me ass for years. I'm reading more now, I'm seeking knowledge and inspiration, and most importantly, I'm moving again. I read this post from my Mark Manson and he's bang on.

Sit down!

This past Sunday, I sat with a remarkable woman named Lindsay Knight. As soon as I sat down, she looked at me and said; “Wow. You have a lot going on in there.” We sat for what felt like half an hour but was almost three. She did my life path and outlined all the places where I had acquiesced to other people.

The repeated patterns in my life were so clear and obvious to her. They are clear to me now too. I had always said I was curious about others. I felt the need to help and talk about them. She said that was a defence to not allow myself to show up. I had lived a life avoiding any conversation about me for fear I’d appear egotistical. She called bullshit. I was scared. I didn’t want to make a fuss. I did everything to smooth things over. I didn’t want to offend or stand up for myself. She smacked me around and it was wonderful.

Wake up!

I’m writing a book, I’m working with clients, I’m meeting prospective clients, I’m finding my way after years of being lost, and all the while thinking I was fooling everyone around me that I had my shit together. Lindsay woke me up to see me.

I don’t know if this is for you. For me, it’s life changing. I slept through the night last night for the first time in years. I woke refreshed and ready to write. I have begun to allow myself to be creative again and do what I want in my life. It has reminded me to stand up for me and do what I want with my truth no matter what anyone else thinks.

I had forgotten that or maybe never knew it.
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As a passionate leader, Kneale Mann has extensive experience in project management, leadership development, business, marketing, media, and talent coaching in numerous industries and organizations including; radio, digital marketing, corporate training, real estate, financial services, healthcare and more. He is always open to meeting companies and organizations who want to become even greater.