I'll Go First

I do wake up at 4am wondering if my life is fulfilled. It may not be the same time on the clock for you, but I'm going to guess I'm not alone. I worked with a guy early in my career who was instrumental in my professional development. He was awesome, in fact. And he passed away earlier this month. He was about 15 years older than me and now I'm thinking about what will I do in the next decade and a half that will matter. 

I get lost. I get scared. Sometimes I don't know what to do next. Occasionally I forget that I do have gifts to give the world and just to keep going. I can say the same for you. There are times when I wonder if it will all work out. Of course, worrying with no action won't get me anywhere, so I give myself a mental kick in the backside and keep going. 

What Have We Learned? 

We are still in a global pandemic and if the conversations I've had over the least 18 months are anything like the ones you've had, people are stressed but wondering what they want to truly do with their lives to be happy. I spoke with a colleague this week I hadn't spoken with in probably a decade. She and her partner are thinking seriously about dumping their careers, selling their house, getting rid of most of their stuff, and moving to Costa Rica to help others. That's so cool and brave. 

I don't suggest we have to go to those lengths to find happiness, but doing the same crap we've been doing for the last couple of decades may not be working either. So yeah, there are early mornings when I wonder what I could be doing to better my life and the lives of others. And that's okay because I will be more worried when I stop thinking about those things. 

Now it's your turn.

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The Bully and Radiohead

I was having breakfast with a great friend and colleague this week and we started talking about how each of us often gets in the way of our own success. Why do we do that? Is it self-sabotage? Is it a fear of failure or success? We humans aren't born with fear; we teach ourselves fear. It's easy to blame outside sources but we have a choice on how we process influences and what to do next.

In a previous chapter of my career, I worked in the radio industry and during the last few years of that, I oversaw the launch of two radio stations from concept to creation and then went on to consult a handful of radio station clients in my consulting work. But I told my friend I'm often visited by a force that seems to hold me back. As I continue my work at an executive recruiter, it's not the candidates or clients who are in my way, it's me!

Voices Inside Your Head

So she put me through an exercise. She said we will call that force - The Bully; and the man who launched radio stations and built teams with confidence, we'll call him Radiohead. She warned me the bully is my comfort zone; my ability to fail without trying because it wasn't meant to be. She said it was a bunch of hot air meaning nothing. She then said whenever the bully shows up, thank him for his time and wish him well and focus back on Radiohead.

You can put your own labels on your life but you have them. There are two strong forces pulling you in opposite directions. One likes it safe so it reminds you to not take bold moves while the other has shown up when you weren't even paying attention because you were so focused on the task at hand.

Say goodbye to the bully and welcome radiohead.
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Time is a Dangerous Partner

Time can fool us into thinking we can buy her or wait for her or allow her to show us when to strike; when to move; when to take that step. All the while she is still. She is where she was a moment ago and where she'll be a year from now.

She is time. It is us who moves through her; not her who moves through us.

She knows what we want and yet we often wait for that perfect sign from her in an imperfectly gorgeous life that will never show us until we open our eyes and be honest with ourselves.

Time doesn't wait; it's up to us to move.

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Asking for Help

I had a great chat last week with a good friend. She said I wasn’t being open enough here on my website and I wasn’t putting enough skin in the game for you to understand my point of view and share more of me. She made some great points.

Then this week, I had one of those life conversations with my best friend. We’ve known each other since high school. It’s a rich relationship. No topic is off-limits. We talk about careers and relationships, music and cars, dreams and wishes, and we have been there for each other through the ups and downs over 35 years.

We’re often asked how we became friends because we are so different. He is analytical and I am emotional. He is a math guy and I’m a creative guy. But we find common ground and enjoy the differences each bring to the friendship.

Upon Reflection

Both conversations were actually about me and I didn’t realize it until a few days later. I am in the process of reviewing my entire career, my life, my relationships, and my work. I have been through the most transformative year of my life. Both know me well and in their own way outlined that I wasn’t believing in myself as much as others do or as much as I believe in others!

Then I had a call yesterday with a colleague in Seattle I met on the social web. We don’t know each other that well but it was a fantastic conversation about where each of us is and where we want to be in our lives. We became fast friends a couple of years ago and though we don’t talk often, it’s one of those relationships that you can go months without talking then pick it up like it was yesterday.

Two-Way Street

The real takeaway from all three conversations was that I enjoy helping others but have a terrible time asking for help. She asked how she could help me write stronger posts. My best friend offered to introduce me to two new clients and told me he will help anyway he can. And my Seattle friend ended the call with a genuine; “Let me know what you need from me”.

I finally slowed down for five seconds and realized three people who were offering to help me. We are told that a stiff upper lip, smile on our face, and shoulders back is the way to go. We aren’t allowed to be unsure or ask a friend for advice or guidance. And frankly, that’s a bunch of crap! Offer help and ask for help.

Your relationships and your life will be richer for it!
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Kneale Mann | People + Priority = Profit

2015 – Now What?

It’s a new year, fresh ideas, clean slate, and a list of resolutions this time we mean to keep. But how critical is today in our lives, really? Is it the fact we need the first day of a year to mean something to push us to make those changes and improvements we've always wanted to make? But while we're here, perhaps it's as good a time as any to set and reset some goals. Here are some questions to ponder.

Will we...

Change the self-doubt narrative?
Not over think and take the shot this time?
Learn from the past and improve on the present?
Stop stopping and go through with it?
Not let naysayers slow us down?
Believe our ideas are just as valid?
Focus on what we want and do what it takes to get it?

There’s only one way to find out.
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Kneale Mann | People + Priority = Profit

lednica

Mining the Bucket List

We all have a list, whether it resides in our minds only to be viewed during those private times when we want to let our dreams fly or actually written down somewhere. This is not about winning a lottery or becoming fabulously rich, at least not for me, but it is a list of items you want to accomplish before you die. It sounds ominous. It was a charming film with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. But we all have one. Some call it a bucket list, perhaps a better title is the someday list. Someday we’ll get to that, someday we’ll achieve that.

I want to do more traveling, work with fascinating people, help where I can with whatever experience I can bring, see Europe, visit Australia, try zip lining, do a lap in an F1 car and many other things. Some excite me, some terrify me but all make me feel alive when I think about them. But it’s all pie in the sky without action, without a plan to actually accomplish the items on the list.

Life Gets in the Way

We get caught by the often self-induced emergencies in our day. We say things like “Wow, that was a tough week, so glad it’s the weekend” but we barely ever give much credence to the finality of life. We are not going to be here forever. We will not get it all done. We spend far too much of our precious time wishing and hoping for some day that never arrives.

Our minds take us on a banal journey of tasks and deadlines. We have to make our quarter, hit the numbers, beat the other company and launch the initiative. And to borrow from the Bard, it’s all a bunch of noise signifying nothing. The one emotion we all feel, consciously or subconsciously, is a need for purpose in our lives. All of this chatter about followers and connections, this portal or that interface means the square root of nothing if we can’t feel it right in our core and make human connection.

TED Returns

One item on my bucket (or someday) list is attending the TED conference in California which is on this week. Some of the brightest and most fascinating people – on stage and in the audience – attend this exclusive event. Admission is $6,000. Admission for TED2012 will be $7,500. I know a few people who have attended and all say without hesitation it is worth every penny.

From TED2011, French artist and TED Prize winner JR talks about how he has tried to make the world a better place.



Kneale Mann

visual credit: TED

We Are All Makers

Whether you run a business, work for others or spend your weekends at your hobby or craft, you are a maker. We produce objects and content, we share ideas and create products. No matter what “job” you have, you create something.

Dale Dougherty co-founded O'Reilly Media and is a technical publisher and conference organizer. He and partner Tim O'Reilly first coined the phrase Web 2.0. He created Make Magazine and is founder of Make Faire which has annual events in New York, Detroit and San Francisco.

Here he explains his one simple theory. [video]


Kneale Mann

video credit: TED

Where Does It Hurt?

Sally wakes up Wednesday morning. Her tummy aches. She calls for her mom. The first thing her mom says is; “Where does it hurt?”

Batter Up

Carl loves playing baseball in his Thursday night league. It’s the 6th inning, Carl is at the plate, man on 1st, his team is down 4-2. Fastball, perfect, down the middle. Carl connects and the ball sails over the shortstop’s head. Fielder picks it up and throws toward the plate as Carl’s teammate rounds 3rd. Ball meets glove. Catcher meets Runner. Suddenly, there is a heap at the plate. Shouts immediately come from everywhere “Are you guys okay”. Carl's teammate says; "Am I safe?"

Tick Tock

Jerry is late for the sales meeting. Jerry is late most weeks. He can somehow make the 7am tee-time on Saturday but 8:15 comes way too on a Tuesday. This week, the boss tells Jerry that the big account called and is ready to cancel. He then informs Jerry that he’s been late for the sales meeting 21 times this year. It’s not looking for dear old Jer.

Feel The Burn

Mile twenty-three was especially difficult for Marie. After years of training, she had never felt it before. Sure, she was familiar with the wall but this time was different. This was her third marathon and this didn’t happen on the first two. There was a point where she felt it was too difficult and she wasn’t going to be able to make those last three miles.

Just Breathe

Brice has the biggest presentation of his career in the morning. He has over prepared for this one. His theories, his bright personality, his smarts got him to this point. Brice is terrified. It’s as if everything he ever learned or wrote on the topic has vanished. Cold sweats. Shaking. Nervous. Can’t sleep.

Find The Pain

If you've ever heard the phrase "find the pain" you know more than most who sell stuff for a living - and we all sell stuff for a living. It's not enough to find out that someone needs bigger profits. You need to find out the cause, the reason and it's not always sales. You need to find the pain.

If you work in the medical community or you're a parent, you certainly know what it means to find the pain. The old sales' adage that you aren't selling a drill but a way to put a hole in the wall to hang that picture rings true.

We often forget that we connect with other humans. They have deadlines, fears, pain, concern, stress and all the other stuff we have. But somehow we forget. Why is that?

@knealemann

photo credit: http://assets.disaboom.com