Vän Friends Amie

When I was younger, friends were the people you hung out with, went to parties with, played sports with, worked with, and you didn't overthink. Hey you like hockey? Me too. Let's hang out. You saw them all the time; you knew who your friends were.  

Some of the people I was closest to are no longer part of my everyday life and I'm not in their life. We've moved on; met other people; traveled other journeys. I wonder how my buddy Andy is doing these days. We were hooked at the shoulder for all those road hockey games and listening to new albums. Then we grew up and did life stuff. But if we bumped into each other tomorrow, I suspect we'd have awesome stories to share!  

Ageless connections 

I’ve also made great friends later in life. Some started as colleagues or clients and, somewhere along the way, became people I genuinely care about. My circle has changed over the years. I'm sure yours has as well. I'm lucky to know a handful of people who know me, make me laugh, tell me when I'm being an idiot, and are somehow happy to sit around a table for a couple of hours and share time.

That's what I appreciate about real friendship. You don't have to perform or keep score. You just know. And after all these years, I'm grateful for the people I know. 

 I hope you are too.

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The Power of Music

It has the ability to evoke deep emotions and transport us to another time and place. It's an art form that has been an integral part of human culture for thousands of years, and continues to play a significant role in our lives today. The impact of music on our lives is undeniable and it can be quite personal.

Music has a way of bridging the gap between individuals and creating a sense of community. It can serve as a unifying force, breaking down cultural, linguistic, and socioeconomic barriers, and bring people together in a shared experience. Or simply a way to loosen the mood at the board meeting.

A Tool for Self-Expression 

For many musicians and songwriters, the creative process of writing and performing music is a way to convey their emotions, experiences, and perspectives to the world. It is a way for them to connect with their audience, and to inspire and empower others. 

The impact of music on our emotions is well documented. It's why music is often used in therapy, to help individuals express their feelings, heal from injuries, and work through challenging emotions. The Canadian Music Therapy Fund exists for that very reason.

Culture and Context 

Music is also an important part of our cultural heritage. From classical compositions to indigenous folk songs, music is a testament to the creativity and ingenuity of our predecessors, and serves as a reminder of the importance of preserving our cultural heritage for future generations.

Whether you're a musician, music lover, or simply someone who appreciates the power of a good tune, the impact of music on our lives is irrefutable, and we should never underestimate its ability to enrich and transform us. 

I must now crank my ear buds. _________________________________________________________________

Share Don't Compare

Some of our most memorable experiences are unplanned. Like the time I ran into a buddy from college with whom I hadn't seen in probably fifteen years. He had gotten married, had a daughter and twin boys. His business was doing well and he had just been awarded a customer contract that was pretty much going to set him up financially for the rest of his kids' lives. 

We had coffee and caught up. He had done all these things since our silly days of college but deep down he hadn't changed a bit. I was suddenly taking stock on how I didn't have millions and he suddenly said; "So, what was it like to meet U2?" It was awesome but I didn't have a lifetime of money in the bank or three awesome kids. 

Look at you!

He went on to tell me about my accomplishments. Unlike most, working in radio caused some to know of my work. My college chum wasn't comparing; he was sharing. He had humility toward his success and was more interested in mine. While I was comparing bank accounts like a shallow idiot. 

We all have a story to tell. You may not think you have much to share at a college reunion, but you have done some things others may remark on. It doesn't matter if you haven't been on the radio or built a multi-million dollar company. 

Zero-sum

There will always be people richer than us, slimmer than us, younger than us, and more "successful" than us. And there will be plenty who feel that way about us. My friend said it was no contest if he ever had to choose between his business and his family. No success was worth losing them.

If we can stop comparing for a moment and cherish what we have and have done, perhaps we won't focus on scarcity but rather abundance. It was great to see my old pal again and he taught me a lot that day. 

A look outside can often give us better perspective inside. 

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Forward Steps Back

I was thinking about a situation that happened a couple of years ago that sucked. Life moved on but I still think about it. I've asked numerous people if they have events they relive in their heads over and over again. The answer is almost always yes because most of us do. But why is that?

I'm not suggesting we don't relive happy memories, but the challenges seem to cut deeper for some reason. Is it perhaps because we are still learning a lesson? I know this, the more we try and not think about those events, the more we think about them. If I was to ask you to not think about an orange elephant riding a motorcycle – good luck getting that image out of your head!

Beware of the Lizard Brain

I'd consider myself a fairly smart dude, so why can't I just tell myself to stop letting something that has already happened, which I cannot change, continue to bug me? It has to do with the part of the limbic system in our brains that is in charge of fight, flight, feed, fear, or freeze. It is our survival mechanism which decides what we do next if we are experiencing stress. It's why we can't seem to get started on the project even though we know the deadline looms.

If we have a situation, current or past, real or imagined, it will react immediately. If we are experiencing or have experienced pain, it will focus solely on that moment. When I think of that event, it's as if I am reliving it over and over again. 

Negative vs Positive

Perhaps this is more prevalent in Western culture, but we seem to do it more often when remembering negative situations over joyous ones. Do we think we don't deserve joy and need to pay for pain? I'm obviously not a psychologist but I think there's something to that. Our frontal lobe is in charge of reasoning, motor skills, higher level cognition, and expressive language. So our complicated brain starts to fight with itself. 

I've started an exercise and like most when you begin, I'm terrible at it, but I'm trying to think of five positive things in my life or events that have happened whenever a negative thought or memory crosses my mind. When I can do it successfully, it actually works. So perhaps you can try it if you can't seem to get past a negative event in your past.

I wonder how the elephant balances on that motorcycle? 

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What About Now?

Have you ever been in a situation where you have to tackle a new task or refine an idea or meet a deadline but been unsure where to begin? That’s obviously rhetorical because we all have but the trick is how we successfully get out of that first key step to move forward.

It’s often been said leadership is about results but those results have to begin with an idea that must be advanced and refined before we can deliver it. But how much think time do we allow in our day to even get any of done? Our biggest hurdle is often us and in our inability to get started.

Ideas to get us moving forward.

Inspiration can often be unexpected. Recently, I was renewing my passport and while leaving the office I looked at my old one that had been with me for every flight, hotel, packed bag, cancelled flight, security check, delayed flight, and journey since 2007. Five years of fun, adventures, stress, bad food, opportunities, laughs, setbacks, great meals, and new friends.

How could a passport renewal create such a rush of memories? Perhaps it’s why we have pictures that trigger the emotion we felt at the time they were taken. It's not good to feel your best is behind you, but lessons and memories are part the deal.

Memories not Mementos

No matter what expertise we deploy, we can’t change the past. But it can teach us and remind us. It can clear a path to what could work in the future. Think about how you can apply that lesson to your leadership journey.

It’s the people who touch our lives and the experiences we most recap and recall. That booklet filed with paper reminded me to get back in touch with a few friends, remember good times, and think of lessons learned which weren't pleasant at the time but were necessary to reach the next milestone.

We need to give the past the respect it deserves, but on our way to the future, we can't forget to enjoy the now.
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Happy Christmas

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Kneale Mann

Pogues | Kirsty MacColl

Perspective

Inspiration can often be unexpected. Recently, I was renewing my passport and while leaving the office I looked at my old one that had been with me for every flight, hotel, packed bag, cancelled flight, security check, delayed flight, and journey since 2007. Five years of fun, adventures, stress, bad food, opportunities, laughs, setbacks, great meals, and new friends.

How could a passport renewal create such a rush of memories? Perhaps it’s why we have pictures that trigger the emotion we felt at the time they were taken. It's not good to feel your best is behind you, but lessons and memories are part the deal.

Memories not Mementos

No matter what expertise we deploy, we can’t change the past. But it can teach us and remind us. It can clear a path to what could work in the future. Think about how you can apply that lesson to your leadership journey.

It’s the people who touch our lives and the experiences we most recap and recall. That booklet filed with paper reminded me to get back in touch with a few friends, remember good times, and think of lessons learned which weren't pleasant at the time but were necessary to reach the next milestone.

We need to give the past the respect it deserves, but on our way to the future, we can't forget to enjoy the now.

Kneale Mann

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