Showing posts with label moments. Show all posts
Showing posts with label moments. Show all posts

April 24, 2025

Stay Out of the Shallow End

Some of our most memorable experiences are unplanned. Like the time I ran into a buddy from college with whom I hadn't seen in probably fifteen years. He had gotten married, had a daughter and twin boys. His business was doing well and he had just been awarded a customer contract that was pretty much going to set him up financially for the rest of his kids' lives. 

We had coffee and caught up. He had done all these things since our silly days of college but deep down he hadn't changed a bit. I was suddenly taking stock on how I didn't have millions and he suddenly said; "So, what was it like to meet all those rock stars years ago?" I didn't have a lifetime of money in the bank or three awesome kids. 

Look at you!

He went on to tell me about my accomplishments. My college friend wasn't comparing; he was sharing. He had humility toward his success and was more interested in mine. While I was comparing bank accounts like a shallow idiot. 

We all have a story to tell. You may not think you have much to share at a college reunion, but you have done some things others may remark on. It doesn't matter if you haven't been on the radio or built a multi-million dollar company. 

Zero-sum

There will always be people richer than us, slimmer than us, younger than us, and more "successful" than us. And there will be plenty who feel that way about us. My friend said it was no contest if he ever had to choose between his business and his family. No success was worth losing them.

If we can stop comparing for a moment and cherish what we have and have done, perhaps we won't focus on scarcity but rather abundance. It was great to see my old pal again and he taught me a lot that day. 

A look oudside can give us better perspective inside
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May 7, 2019

Real Evidence Appearing False

These have been published in numerous psychology articles and on various websites over the years and are worth considering when we're facing life's issues.

Unwanted moments are to be avoided at all costs. You are only as valuable, or worthless, as other people agree that you are. You are responsible for the happiness or unhappiness that others feel. You must learn to tolerate friends and family who have agreed to live with and justify negative states.

You can change what happened yesterday by revisiting and reliving it today. Feeling deeply stressed proves you really care about whatever you’re suffering over.

If you believe in any of these, feel free to stop.
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June 18, 2018

Believing Falsehoods

These have been published in numerous psychology articles and on various websites over the years and are worth considering when we're facing life's issues.

Unwanted moments are to be avoided at all costs. You are only as valuable, or worthless, as other people agree that you are.

You are responsible for the happiness or unhappiness that others feel. You must learn to tolerate friends and family who have agreed to live with and justify negative states.

You can change what happened yesterday by revisiting and reliving it today. Feeling deeply stressed proves you really care about whatever you’re suffering over.

Do you believe any of these? If so, feel free to stop.
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March 16, 2018

What is Inspiration?

You can find it in books, in music, in films, on TV and websites. It's uttered from the greatest minds of human history. If you look long enough, you can find it virtually everywhere. But what does inspiration mean to you? Does it inspire you to read about a rags-to-riches story or about someone overcoming physical challenges? Will it make you move into your truth if you view a movie where the heroine conquers all?

We know what inspiration is, but that isn't enough. We need to find a way to apply it to our lives, our situations, our challenges, or it's just a bunch of words. Inspiration is not likes on your Instagram post or followers on Vero.

words vs actions

One definition is; the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative. Another is; the drawing in of breath; inhalation.

So is inspiration simply taking a deep breath? I don't think that's enough. And I don't think it's enough to know the definition. I've often said –  and often forgotten –  that inspiration doesn't appear with balloons and streamers. It happens in small increments. It could be one word or a gesture or an image that pushes us forward.

I recently posted about motivation and maybe that's an important ingredient to inspiration. If we know what we want and know how to get it but don't move, what's the point? I can post inspiring words or we could go for coffee and I could offer some advice, but will that inspire us? Inspiration is a big word but it doesn't have to be zero-sum. It doesn't take the climbing of a mountain or landing that million dollar deal for us to be inspired. Often it's the small things that matter most.

rinse repeat

We look to heroes who have done great things which inspire us but in my view the application to our own lives is the critical element. I'm going through something right now I've been through before and the same fears have crept into my consciousness.

I'm not yet through it, but I've had to remind myself the steps I took the last time, take that deep breath, and move.

we are human

In 2014, Fortune posted a list of their 50 Greatest Leaders and though there are inspirational people here, they aren't without flaws or mistakes. So perhaps the key piece of finding inspiration is within ourselves and to discover it isn't a perfect path or one single action?

So let's keep listening to that music and reading those books and watching those movies because life is a series of mistakes and actions and inspiring moments we create. Let's inspire each other with those small things so we can get to those big things.

And let's celebrate those moments when they happen.
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July 8, 2017

What Makes You Happy?

Make more money, have more time, buy more things, all seem to be what we think are linked to happiness. Matt Killingsworth has been studying what makes us happy.

It's not what you may think.


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March 4, 2017

Six False Beliefs

These have been published in numerous psychology articles and on various websites over the years and are worth considering when we're facing life's issues.

Unwanted moments are to be avoided at all costs. You are only as valuable, or worthless, as other people agree that you are.

You are responsible for the happiness or unhappiness that others feel. You must learn to tolerate friends and family who have agreed to live with and justify negative states.

You can change what happened yesterday by revisiting and reliving it today. Feeling deeply stressed proves you really care about whatever you’re suffering over.

Don't listen to the false beliefs.
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July 24, 2013

Shiny Things

Make your numbers, finish that task, meet that deadline, the cycle continues as we race to some unknown finish line that keeps moving in the wrong direction. Our impatience is creating less efficiency. The faster we go the slower we get things accomplished.

Matt Killingsworth has been studying what makes us happy and explains some of his findings in his TEDx Talk. This video is only 10 minutes long so hopefully your mind won't wander too much.

Squirrel!


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Kneale Mann | Leadership and Culture strategist, writer, speaker, executive coach engaging leaders, collaborative teams, and strong business results.

November 8, 2012

Our Distracted Minds

Other than our ability to reason and opposable thumbs we humans certainly do spend a lot of our precious time worrying about stuff that has happened or may never happen. Eckhart Tolle says we spend most of our time thinking of the past and the future and very little on the moment we’re in right now.

Make more money, have more time, buy more things, all seem to be what we think are linked to happiness. There is ample data proving that is untrue.

What Was That?

Another fact is our inability to fully focus. We spend a lot of our time thinking about other things other than what we're doing. Think about that as you become a better leader. Half of your team may not be paying attention at any given moment.

Matt Killingsworth has been studying what makes us happy and explains some of his findings in his 2011 TEDx Talk. This video is only 10 minutes long so hopefully your mind won't wander too much.


Kneale Mann

TEDx | Matt Killingsworth
 
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